5 words essential to your vocabulary you have never heard before

I don't have much in common with Shakespeare. The guy seems pretty cool, but the hundreds of years and difference in continents would definitely put a damper on any budding friendship. However, I would have liked to pick ol' Willy's brain on our shared love of words.

Along with writing some pretty influential stuff, W-Shake also invented over 1,000 words still used today. I don't know about the rest of the population, but if 600 years from now, a chunk of words created by me invaded the English language, I'd (posthumously) be pretty stoked.

So, out with the old and in with the new. Alas, good people, heartily I say unto you, 5 words essential to your vocabulary in which ye have never heard before.

meteorolie [me-tee-yor-o-lahy]
noun

• A falsehood uttered by the weatherman regarding the weather conditions to arise during a specified period of time 

The girl was distraught by the meteorolie heard before she was knocked unconscious by hail .during what was forecasted to be a sunny day.

peeplexed [pee-pleck-sd]
verb

• A state in which one is engaging in an intense conversation but urgently needs to urinate

The girl was extremely peeplexed while listening to a friend's relationship woes.

caffeinavore [caf-een-a-vor]
noun

1. One who depends solely on caffeine for energy and nourishment 
2. Every college student in the United States 

Beware of the caffeinavores at Starbucks during prime consumption hours. 

mattrecomb [mat-tray-comb]
noun

1. The dark, cavernous space under one's bed known to consume articles of clothing and pets
2. A habitat for various monsters
3. See also mattress and catacomb

The small child feared the depths of the mattrecomb.

spambush [spam-bush]
verb

1. A large number of junk emails all arriving in a short period of time time
2. An attack using popular canned "meat" as the primary weapon of choice 

I believe my inbox is about to be spambushed. 

Challenge accepted, Shakespeare. More words to come. What are some words you believe should be adopted by the English language?