5 Reasons Why Baby Dogs Beat Boyfriends

My heart is restless. I'm distractible (more than usual). I can't sleep. I can't eat. The apartment is too quiet. The couch is too big. Something's just not right here. 

Now that I am doing things like making budgets, cooking, and paying rent, the sweet aroma of independence is tinged with a desire for companionship. Coming home to an empty apartment is a bummer, and I want someone I can count on to be there for me after a long day at work. 

Cupid has struck once again.

I'm in puppy love. 

Sure, some may say the solution to my problems is a commitment to a tall-dark-and-handsome who promises to buy me dinner and send me artfully worded text messages that make me go mush, but I beg to differ for a few key reasons.

5. Puppies double as vacuum cleaners. As a regular rider of the struggle bus, I drop food on the floor every day. I would only have a 10% chance of getting a guy to lick the pasta sauce off the floor in a heated game of "1 to 10," but my puppy would happily clean up the mess, no strings attached.

4. Puppy owners have rockstar status. In your puppy's eyes, you are someone worth celebrating, every time you walk in the door. No matter the fact you just got done running and look like a wet tomato, in the eyes of the puppy, you are Beyonce. 

3. Puppies love all your girly TV shows and movies. All that matters is that you share the couch.

2. Puppies eat twice a day. Sorry guys, but your 17 meals a day is tough to keep up with sometimes.

1. Puppies are just so darn cute. Don't get me wrong, my ex-boyfriend Ryan Gosling is a tough face to beat, but, I mean come on....

Ding ding ding! Baby dogs win this round, ladies and gents.

The Grown Up Life: 10 Facts about my First Go at Adulthood

One week ago today, I scrawled my massive signature across the document officially making me the renter of my first apartment.

I'm officially an adult! I thought, crossing the "t" on my last name. I've done it! I'm young, ambitious and ready to rock real life!

"Do you want me to take your picture signing the paper?" my mom enthusiastically asked, bringing the vision of a more sophisticated version of myself leaving a chic apartment successfully in skyscraper heels to a standstill. 

I guess I'm not there quite yet.

But nevertheless, I had a pretty fabulous first week of "adulthood."

This week....

1. I got a new roommate. Her name is Rachael and she rocks.

2. Several new words have invaded my everyday vocabulary including....

     -App Assessment (see also gold) 

     -UFC (short for upfront contract, not the fighting people)

     -List building (a little like being a detective, I think it should be called info extraction)

     -Cold calling (many I've made are pretty much hypothermic)

3. I learned there are more smartphones sold than babies born in the world on any given day! Shocking it took this long. I mean, babies are great, but can a baby find you the nearest Starbucks?

4. The refrigerator was no match for Rachael and I...we successfully cooked 4 dinners for ourselves! My most creative contribution? Salad with strawberries, cashews, and avocado. Food Network has already called twice (just kidding).

5. We were scouted to be hair models! The lady opened the door of the salon and said, "do you two want to be hair models? Hair cuts and colors are for free!" and we said, "sure."

6. Major adventuring took place. Turns out our neighborhood is overflowing with coolness and hidden gems.

7. We time traveled Wednesday afternoon. Back to the early 1960's for a company photo shoot. 

8. Nerd Alert: I got a library card! That list of books I want to read has been stagnant for far too long. Hopefully they don't do borrowing background checks....I have close to $10 in fines on my home library card. Oops.

9. I was able to hang with my company compadres on several occasions. So thankful I'll be surrounded by super cool people all summer long. So much talent up in that office.

Finally...

10. This week was chock full of change. Some have been great, others have been tough. I'm learning that there is so much to learn, and to be humble above all. Comparing yourself to others is super unproductive, and keeping a positive and teachable attitude is absolutely essential. Life is trial and error, stumbling before running, bellyflopping before diving. Above all, I'm trying to remember its not about me. All I have I owe to Him, and it is Him that deserves it all. 

Carpe Diem Project Update

Something about the mixture of a cloudless sky, pink lemonade, a brand new pair of shorts and eyes that actually feel awake makes me want summer as my home. If only I could live in the essence of summer, wear the sunshine as perfume, walk to the soundtrack of live music in the park, and sleep under the stars every night after a dinner of sweet tea, barbeque chicken and watermelon....

....until I got a massive sunburn and my allergies suffocated me and I weighed 400 pounds. But hey, a girl can dream, right?

Since my summer began a few short weeks ago, I've been attempting to carpe the diems out of the first chunk of my summer. This has meant...

-Limited social media usage
-Limited TV watching
-Lots of reading
-Lots of creativity

And the results are in!

1. I am able to fall asleep faster and sleep better at night. Reading before bed is much more relaxing than having a computer screen shoved in your face.
2. Books are no longer overwhelming. I thought the bookworm in me was long dead and gone, but by limiting my screen time, it was revived at last.
3. Creativity skyrockets when mindlessness plummets.
4. The project is doable. Once staying off mindless media was graced with the kiss of routine, the habit was broken.
5. Without the distraction of impulsive social media checking, I've been able to make some memories that DON'T involve status updates or relationship changes. I'd take a late night trampoline session, a crazy good suspense story, driveway track meets, random dance parties and ice cream runs over sitting on my badonk any day.

Tomorrow marks the start of phase 2. In less than 12 hours my first internship will begin! I am beyond excited for the opportunity to practice my PR prowess and do what I love. Stay tuned folks! Time to get down to business. 

5 words essential to your vocabulary you have never heard before

I don't have much in common with Shakespeare. The guy seems pretty cool, but the hundreds of years and difference in continents would definitely put a damper on any budding friendship. However, I would have liked to pick ol' Willy's brain on our shared love of words.

Along with writing some pretty influential stuff, W-Shake also invented over 1,000 words still used today. I don't know about the rest of the population, but if 600 years from now, a chunk of words created by me invaded the English language, I'd (posthumously) be pretty stoked.

So, out with the old and in with the new. Alas, good people, heartily I say unto you, 5 words essential to your vocabulary in which ye have never heard before.

meteorolie [me-tee-yor-o-lahy]
noun

• A falsehood uttered by the weatherman regarding the weather conditions to arise during a specified period of time 

The girl was distraught by the meteorolie heard before she was knocked unconscious by hail .during what was forecasted to be a sunny day.

peeplexed [pee-pleck-sd]
verb

• A state in which one is engaging in an intense conversation but urgently needs to urinate

The girl was extremely peeplexed while listening to a friend's relationship woes.

caffeinavore [caf-een-a-vor]
noun

1. One who depends solely on caffeine for energy and nourishment 
2. Every college student in the United States 

Beware of the caffeinavores at Starbucks during prime consumption hours. 

mattrecomb [mat-tray-comb]
noun

1. The dark, cavernous space under one's bed known to consume articles of clothing and pets
2. A habitat for various monsters
3. See also mattress and catacomb

The small child feared the depths of the mattrecomb.

spambush [spam-bush]
verb

1. A large number of junk emails all arriving in a short period of time time
2. An attack using popular canned "meat" as the primary weapon of choice 

I believe my inbox is about to be spambushed. 

Challenge accepted, Shakespeare. More words to come. What are some words you believe should be adopted by the English language?